new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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