If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
