Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
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