I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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