Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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