I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
