i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
