I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize