so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
