I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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