Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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