Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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