It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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