What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
