I have demons in me.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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