Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
