In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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