Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
