so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
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