i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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