Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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