Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
