If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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