Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
