Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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