I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
