Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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