she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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