That's when you crack a 10am beer
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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