i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize
