Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
