Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
