This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
