Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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