Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
