Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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