just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
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