i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize