I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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