So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
