That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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