I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
