I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
