You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
