PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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