She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
