Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
