The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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