making cat noises will not fix the situation.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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