i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
