Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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